Aww I AMM SADS!!

"If your dream was to one day see a Sum 41/

Avril Lavigne supergroup, we’ve got some

miserable news for you.

You have crap dreams. Seriously, try and upgrade your ambition a little. Oh, and the other piece of miserable news is that the aforementioned supergroup will never come to pass – following their recent split announcement, Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley have filed for divorce.

Apparently Avril Lavigne cited irreconcilable differences in her divorce papers, but that’s just legal talk. We think it means that they had to get divorced because literally nobody on the planet had thought about either of them once in the last two years.

Exciting news! There’s a very good chance that Avril Lavigne’s next record will be her messy break-up album! Hooray! Finally, we’ll get to see what gems can be conjured up when the brains behind Sk8er Boi and that Girlfriend song that sounded like every other song ever gets to plumb the very depths of her emotion. So chances are most of the songs will be identical to Sk8er Boi and Girlfriend, except they’ll have lyrics that rhyme ’sad’ with ‘bad’ and ‘divorce’ with ‘horse’.

Because, you see, Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley are no more. Although they announced their split a few weeks ago, Avril Lavigne has now formally filed for divorce. E! Online paints the sad picture of their final days together:

Irreconcilable differences were cited as the reason for the split, according to the petition filed last Friday in Los Angeles Superior Court… A source told E! News that Lavigne and Whibley had been “growing apart for months. They have become more like business partners rather than husband and wife.”

Just so you know, we think that ‘irreconcilable differences’ is a just a box that needs to be checked on the divorce form. Avril Lavigne almost certainly didn’t have to write it down by herself, otherwise we’re pretty sure that that the reason cited for the split would have been ‘I AMM SADS’ written in fingerpaint next to a crude picture of a sad face.

Similarly, we’re not sure that we buy this whole ‘business partner’ thing, either. Because if Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley really were business partners, then their business would have been stupid-haired pop-rock that nobody has really liked for at least five years, and their board of shareholders would have given them a vote of no confidence long before now.

But whatever the reason for their divorce, we hope that both Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley can go on to find happiness in other areas of their lives. For instance, maybe Avril Lavigne could throw herself into education and finally work out what that tricky number that comes after six is. And as long as there’s television there’ll always be a desperate need for a minor bumbling sitcom character called Deryck Whibley.

We wish them both well. By which we mean that we hope we never hear anything about either of them ever again."

That's right, she's a free woman again! Finally!

*copied from hecklerspray.com*